Queueing

We are meant to be a nation of complainers. When other countries try to mock us they do it via our weather and by the fact we whinge and moan. They ignore our irony and humour, and completely disregard our quirkiness. We do this when mocking other nations too. We forget the French are stylish, that many Americans are clever and the Germans are… 

But for a nation of complainers we are actually rubbish at it. How do I know this? Well, because the most complained about advert on British TV ever, was complained about only 1,671 times. That was it. Beyond the 7th most complained about advert, no more than 1,000 people complained. As a nation of supposed moaners, all 62 million of us, 1,671 people is the most that have bothered to complain about a TV advert. It's also quite likely that most of the people that reported the most offensive advert, people with their gobs full of KFC singing, also complained about the other adverts in the top 10 too. So it's not like we can add up all the complaints to make this stereotype seem more likely. 

So if we aren't a nation of moaners the list of ads that were complained about gives us no insight into what this nation takes offence to. All we know is what the small amount of complainers don't like. Other than the offence taken to the dereliction of table manners seen in the KFC advert, here is a list of some of the things the complainers don't like:

• Singing
• Auctions
• Football Players
• Condoms
• Sex
• Sexual Health
• Fighting
• Sophie Dahl
• Lingerie
• Rap
• Bikinis
• Lynx
• Zombies

Some of the things they do seem to like are:

• Cats
• Christianity
• The Pope
• Climate Change 
• Child Abuse

Now of course I don't share the same views as these people but can sympathise and agree with some of their prefences and dislikes. I mean, no one likes footballers and zombies; things with such a low intellect are very difficult to like. But, if other countries see this, considering they're predisposed to thinking we are all moaners, they might think that most of us dislike the same things; or even worse, like similar things. That would be a very bad thing, we'd go from a nation of complainers to cat lovers. This simply cannot happen.

What we need to do is reclaim our love of queuing. Other nations don't get the concept of queueing properly, which they think is reason enough to mock us making it the prefect attribute to be known for. Queueing is something that, despite it being a reason for other nations to laugh at us, we can be proud of. If you have ever witnessed the shambolic jostling and shoving that occurs when foreigners try to queue, you will know that being able to queue properly and politely is far superior. 

So next time you are in a queueing situation, and especially if there are foreigners around or you're abroad, make sure you do it properly. Do not cut in, do not allow anyone else to cut in and keep it orderly. We'll shake this complaining stereotype sooner than you know it and be a proud nation of queuers.